I was at Target recently with my sons to look for a Lego Batmobile set (which, my youngest learned in horror, had since been discontinued). While the kids were playing games on iPad demos in the store (How they quickly forgot about Batman), I took a look at the newest DVDs on a nearby shelf.
Not surprisingly, none of the titles rang a bell since I practically live under a rock. However, one title caught my eye: Just Before I Go. The actor’s melancholy expression and the tag line, Ending It All Was Only The Beginning, led me to believe that it dealt with suicide. Sure enough, I flipped the DVD over and read the synopsis. Sounded intriguing.
There was only one problem: Seann William Scott. Really?! He plays a total idiot in all his movies. Nevertheless, I jotted down the title in my iNotes (or whatever it’s called) to watch it at some point.
Tonight was the night. Friday after work. Wife and kids gone. Amazon rental. A nice bowl of Lucky Charms for dinner. I was set. I can always turn it off when the flick gets juvenile, I thought.
But… It didn’t.
Not an Oscar contender by any means, but it was GOOD. All the poignancy that I was hoping for.
**SPOILER ALERT**
I even started blubbering like a baby when Scott’s character met his deceased father on the lake during a near-death experience.
**SPOILER OVER**
The movie is about a man who, before committing suicide, goes back to his hometown to confront some painful childhood memories “just before he goes.” I don’t want to reveal too much, except that this is not a screwball comedy. It tackles several thorny issues effectively I think.
Bottom line: If you are feeling depressed or even suicidal, do yourself a favor and watch this movie. Do it for me even. Screw what the film critics say about the film. They get paid to tear things apart.
I loved the Emerson quote at the end:
When it’s dark, that’s when you can see the stars.
Just look up and they will always be there.
~t
June 12th, 2015 at 10:54 pm
Topaz,
We are so alike in our suffering, you and I. We have these suicidal ideations and we breathe life and death by suicide every day. We both believe intensely that God is who He says He is and that He is trustworthy. But then our illness makes everthing go crazy and life becomes a blur instead of reality. And we sometimes wonder if God knows what we are going through.
I enjoy your writing, cry when you are hurting, and panic when I think you are ready to give up. Please don’t. I don’t want to have to stop hearing your voice.
I’m glad you found this movie. I intend to watch it tonight. I look for books on suicide just to hear other voices talk about it. There is some good stuff out there. Tragic but good. Like your mind.
Jane
June 13th, 2015 at 9:09 pm
Jane, you are truly wonderful. We may never meet here on Earth for me to thank you in person, but you have a way of lifting me up. Thank you, my friend.
June 13th, 2015 at 3:23 am
Reblogged this on Jessie the Diary and commented:
Maybe there’s a little hope in here.
June 13th, 2015 at 9:06 pm
Thanks for the reblog!
A little hope is sometimes all we need.
June 13th, 2015 at 5:16 am
I had never heard that quote… But it reminded me of an experience/ revelation I had, which I will write about eventually.
It was my first birthday after my fiancé died. I went to the Grand Canyon, it was freezing cold, I was so sad and felt so alone and depressed. Stargazing was one of his passions, and though light pollution is minimal where I live, it’s nothing like the clear winter inky blackness at the Grand Canyon. Stars from horizon to horizon. And I gazing out I marveled at how many more stars there were, and realised this was like Anthony- there weren’t more stars, I could just see them better. They were always there. And that was him… Always there, even if I couldn’t see him.
June 13th, 2015 at 9:05 pm
That is beautiful. Thank you for sharing such a lovely memory.